Results – Bangi Golf Club – 23rd December 2014

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19 players attended on a wet morning. Registrations was easily completed and we played the Kajang and Bangi Nines. About half the players came adorned with red hats. During the second nine the rain became heavy resulting in several cannons heading for the club house. Those that continued on recorded very respectable scores. The winner was Geoff Parslow with a par round of 72 for a massive 45 points. Runner up was Ray Funnel with a 92 for 42 points.

Due to the rain delays and Christmas commitments only 6 attended the excellent lunch at the East of Highway restaurant. In Geoff’s absence from the lunch it was good of him in true Christmas spirit  to donate his winnings back to the kitty.

Many thanks to Iain Wise for doing the arrangements on the day at the club.

Results

Alan Holgate DNF
Richard Moss DNF
Hans Berger 99 for 31 pts
Ted Parslow 90 for 28 pts
Robert Muliss 112 for 26 pts
Bernhard Rohmahn 93 for 31 pts
Peter Barker 81 for 36 pts
Iain Wise 93 for 39 pts
Allan Wright 98 for 33 pts
Geoff McLaws 78 for 37 pts
Klaus Kretzshmar No card returned
Graham Cadman No card returned
Jeff Pearce No Card returned
Barry Cousins No card returned
Martin Walsh 90 for 33pts
Roger Surieux 99 for 36 pts
Geoff Parslow 72 for 45 pts
Brian Stubbs 94 for 39 pts
Ray Funnel 92 for 42 pts



Results – Impian Saujana – 16th December 2014

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Weather conditions today at Impian Saujana were perfect with beautiful blue skies and sunshine as18 of us headed out on split tee boxes at 8:00am. We had one new player join us this week; Peter May introduced by Jeff Pearce and the return of a veteran player; Allan Wright making it a total of flights (2 x 3 balls and 3 x 4 balls).
Course condition was very good except the greens which had unfortunately been recently hollow tined and sanded and had not been rolled. They were very bumpy, sandy and unpredictable making putting a bit of a lottery.

Henning Therkelsen managed a trick shot today managing to hit his ball into his partners’ buggy, lodging in the front tray …. see photograph below. 

We were finished by 12:30 to 1pm and then 13 of the 18 players had lunch at the very good Ken Well Seafood Restaurant. Unfortunately Hans Berger got lost again and aborted. … next time follow someone as this restaurant is a little tricky to find.

Results

Some very good scores today on this course with 6 players playing better than handicap. We had 3 players on 40 then Robert Mulliss, runner up with an excellent 41 points. However the winner with a magnificent 45 points and gross of 87 was Mike Smith. Well done Mike! He started his round with two blobs so just imagine if he had scored there also! The vasectomy kit will be out and applied to his handicap shortly …. 😉

Photos

Henning Therkelsen managed to hit his ball into his partner’s buggy. It was lodged in the front tray of the buggy making it rather impossible to play ….. an unplayable lie was declared for 1 penalty stroke …. bad luck Henning!

Yes again Andrew Cseszko wins the “best attired” golfer award.

Loose Cannons Xmas Lunch – Coliseum Cafe – 12th December 2014

The annual Loose Cannons Xmas lunch was held once again at the classic venue of the Coliseum Cafe on Jalan Tuankul Abdul Rahman on Friday 12th December 2014 … probably because none else would have us!
We had 19 shows for today’s frivolity and as per standard practice we all met up in the front bar before lunch for some pre-lunch drinks. Glen unfortunately could not make it as he was up-to-his-ass in contractors at home without the supervising builder who had disappeared to Cambodia. It was nice to see that the bar and the restaurant through the back were proudly displaying some photographs from our previous escapades here last Xmas …. no doubt after today there will be a few more!
At 1pm prompt we adjourned to the back room behind a rather meagre modesty screen to shroud us from the general public …. this was to no avail as the noise we made no doubt disturbed all diners in this area. As we sat down we commenced the usual child-like displays of firing off poppers, spraying string on each other and generally making rather a lot of mess and noise.
We commenced proceedings with a toast to absent friends and raised our glasses and thoughts for the late Murray Preston and Gordon Wingate who have sadly left for higher fairways. A number of dress code violations were pointed out to some 5 members and they had to down their glass of beer or wine.
The food arrived quickly .. starting with prawn cocktails then followed by a rather tasty pumpkin soup. The wine of course was flowing freely now and we started the traditional procedure of individuals standing and reciting poetry, singing songs or telling jokes. Hans Berger was quick off the mark with his rat-at-tat song which he had already done in the bar prior to lunch.
The main course was the traditional steak pies with vegetables and salad and we also had some very nice roast chicken with gravy. Desert was ice cream and apple pie …. although Hans Berger managed to conjure up an additional chocolate cake from the kitchen somehow.
As the wine continued to flow there were many contributions to the entertainment including Irish songs from Martin Walsh and of course the classic “On Ilkley Moor” from Richard Moss. Iain Wise did another golf impression but didn’t quite match the performance he delivered in Batam. Barry Cousins read an amusing letter and his reply to HSBC regarding insurance cover and also showed the group an ancient hickory shafted golf stick to the group. Tony Morris told his usual annual joke which always goes down well and Robert Mulliss led many a rugby song with the support of the group. Mike Smith told a number of good jokes and also recited some great poems (albeit struggling occasionally to remember the lines) – well done Mike. Paul Geddes was also in good form but for some of his recitals needed a Scottish-English translator. Brian Stubbs was in good vocal form with many jokes no doubt aided by the many white wines he slammed down with Robert Mulliss.
Another excellent Xmas lunch and no doubt we will have a few on-on stories later perhaps.
Many thanks to Andrew Robinson who organised and booked the lunch.
Photos

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Results – Bukit Unggul – 9th December 2014

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As you get older your memory starts to fail (among other things) and to be honest I had forgotten why we hadn’t played Bukit Unggul for so long. I was very quickly reminded of its many failings as the morning progressed. 
Registration
The registration process was abysmal which had been sadly messed up by Ray Funnell trying to help with pre-registering our 16 names the day before …. Ray’s list of 16 names was registered under his name with no reference to my original booking in my name which I had done WITH caddies so there there were no caddies booked …. we eventually manage to scrabble some 4 caddies. 
The desk boy then proceeded to eventually hand write all the starter chits before laboriously entering the same information into his computer ….. but he could not give me a proper printed and itemised receipt to show what I had paid! Having handed over RM1500 for a verbal charge of RM1495 I walked away with no authentication or confirmation of what I had paid for. I eventually did get the proper receipt much later as I teed off and when added up came to RM1207 …. some RM288 less than I had paid for!!! This required me post-game to go back to registration and get this money back from a rather guilty looking desk boy.
Tee Off
The starter was approached to ascertain where our 4 flights should start …. he could not speak or communicate and was not interested in helping out in anything to do with us teeing off. He told us eventually to all tee off on Tee Box 1. As Tee Box 10 only had a 2 ball starting one of our flights moved over there. 
Course Condition
Now on to the course. I remember Bukit Unggul as being bad …… it has certainly not improved in any way whatsoever. The course is in a sad state of disrepair throughout with poorly maintained fairways which have been ravaged by the wild boar, have many patches of uncut grass, holes, and where there is grass it is but a very thin layer over a very muddy soggy layer. There were open drain covers in very poor condition all over the course and multiple areas that had been marked by string or white paint as GUR. The fairways were all covered in cut grass mounds which had not been cleared.
Tee boxes were poor with large areas of bare ground and again there were ares of the tee boxes that had been dug up.
Bunkers were a disgrace with very little sand, many of them water logged or muddy and extremely stony with ragged unkempt edges all around.
The greens were in a fairly sad state and again had been dug up by the wild boar and many areas had simply been marked off with white paint as GUR (on the green!) with mounds of sand on the greens and little or no evidence of any remedial work being carried out to sort this mess. Hole No 2 had about 30% of the green unplayable due to white painted areas!! Many greens were also very bumpy and unpredictable.
I saw no evidence throughout the course of any standard course maintenance …. no sign of anyone working or maintaining the course …..  but of course there were the usual array of Indian ladies sitting around chatting, trying to sell balls with no evidence of work being done. 
I did see the Course Manager making a round in a buggy at one point ….. does he not see these basic issues in the course and take some action! Wish I had the opportunity to talk to him.
Please refer to the photos in this report which highlight some of the many issues discussed above.
Restaurant
The restaurant food and level of service has shown no level of improvement from what I recall from before with the usual slow and tardy service and a few non attentive staff who had to be called on numerous occasions.

In summary I will be removing this course from our playlist and will certainly not be planning to return there again during my tenure as Convenor. It is sad to see such a scenic and interesting course slowly degrading into total disrepair – it really needs a major shakeup there otherwise I can foresee the course being totally unplayable very soon.

Ok … rant over.

Many thanks to Mike Smith who paid for the drinks today at lunch to celebrate his Birthday … he did not elucidate what Birthday it was …. suffice to say it was probably a big one! Thanks Mike!

Results

It was interesting to note that of the top 5 best scores today …. 4 of these were from the players who were members of Bukit Unggul …. obviously local knowledge counts for a lot here. We had 4 players score better than their handicap. The winner with an excellent gross 80 and 44 points was Bernard Romahn with Tony Morris runner up with 43 points and a gross score of 83. Full results below.

Photos

Results – Rahman Putra – 2nd December 2014

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It was a rather wet and soggy course today at Rahman Putra making it even harder work than usual to reach the green. The greens however were in good shape although a little slow. Weather was good and we got off rather painlessly at around 8:00am from two tee boxes on the Hills 9’s.

After the game 12 of us made our way to the Heng Hin Restaurant close-by to the club for a rather frustrating meal with slow/bad service and small portions leaving some Cannons rather light on the first few dishes that were scoffed by the wolves at the other end of the table. Hans Berger kindly sponsored the drinks today to celebrate his recent 200th game with Loose Cannons …. thanks very much Hans.

Results

Scores were not going to be good today and the winner playing to his handicap was Jeff Pearce with a respectable 36 points (gross of 94). Runner up was Henning Therkelsen with a gross of 85 and 35 points. Full results below:

Photos

Results – Amverton Cove Golf & Island Resort – 25th November 2014

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The Trophy Game for November was played at Amverton Cove on a beautiful clear morning. There were 16 Loose Cannons which made for a nice 4 flights teeing off on two separate 9’s. Course conditions were a little wet and the fairways had been left to go a bit – so a bit heavier going than normal. The greens were good although most of them had recently been sanded making them on the slow side. We played from the blue tees as is normal at this course and were all finished in good time by just after 12pm.
Lunch was at the “usual” seafood restaurant just past the bridge on the right after leaving the club …. and NOT the alternative restaurant on the left which had been used last time as the usual one had been closed …. we still had 4 of our party head to this incorrect venue … but they joined us shortly thereafter and luckily had not ordered a banquet for 16 there!
Results
We had some good scores today with half the field scoring better than their handicap. The clear winner today was Allan McNicoll who played an excellent round of 86 for 44 points – a personal best. Runner up was Andrew Robinson on 41 points and a gross of 89. Best gross was Geoff McLaws with a 78. Full results below:

Photos

Results – Nilai Springs Golf & Country Club – 18th November 2014

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We had 23 Loose Cannons this week at Nilai Springs with a tee time booked on 2 tee-boxes at 8:00am. After a tedious and rather inefficient check in process with volumes of paperwork and receipts that fully explain the deforestation in Malaysia we all headed out to our buggies. With 6 flights we had 3 flights aligned for separate tee boxes on Pines and Island nines. However our Flight No 1 decided to not listen to the instructions given and they tee’d off from the incorrect tee box so being the last on that 9 we decided to move over to the Island 9 to tee off. Reaching there we found our 3 flights backed up and then additional 2 balls trying to squeeze in. When asked these 2 balls said they also had a tee time of 8:00am … the same as us. I took the starter to task on this and asked him to sort this out but in the usual Malaysian fashion he did nothing so I needed up taking him to the front desk and complaining …. still nothing happened. This is so typical of Malaysian organisation and very frustrating for anyone trying to arrange a large group like we have. I will be avoiding this course for future games if this is the treatment we get.
So with my blood pressure somewhere in the region of 220/110 our last group eventually tee’d off on the Island 9 at 8:30 or so.
The course had obviously had a lot of rain recently and was rather wet and soggy but the greens were excellent. We managed good time and were not held up further so finished around 1pm. 
Most of us then moved onto Dengkil Seafood Restaurant for an excellent lunch and some much needed beer.
Results
The winner today was Mike Smith on count back from Mike Williams. Mike Smith shot a 95 for 38 points with Mike Williams second with 86 for 38 points. Best gross was Geoff Parslow with 83.
Photos

Results – Perangsang Templer – 11th November 2014

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An excellent turnout of 24 players this week to what may be our last time to play Perangsang Templer as it will most likely close shortly. Weather was good and the course conditions were good apart from a few greens which were being sanded and cored. We got off on split tee boxes so we all finished by around 1pm and then 18 of us re-convened at Tang Dynasty Restaurant for a good lunch kindly ordered by Andrew Robinson. Drinks were generously sponsored by Jeff Pearce who was celebrating his 100th game with Loose Cannons. Jeff also kindly donated some sleeves of golf balls which he gave out for various “prizes” over lunch. Thank you Jeff for your generosity.
Ray Funnell using his new right-handed putting technique has improved his performance …. just wondering when he will throw away all of his left-handed clubs and play everything right-handed!
Richard Moss sporting his new handicap of 33 went from the “high” of the recent Batam Away win to bottom place today on 21 points – winning a sleeve of balls from Jeff Pearce for this fine effort.
Welcome again to our new players; Peter Barker and Rob Russell and a guest of Geoff McLawas, Henning Therkelsen.

Results
Surprisingly no one played under handicap today and the winner who played exactly to handicap with 36 points was Stuart Taylor. Joint runner ups on 35 points were Jeff Pearce and Iain Wise. Full results tabulated below:

Photos

Results – Tasik Puteri – 4th November 2014

With the main group of Cannons on tour this week to Batam, a small group of non tourists assembled for game at Tasik Puteri. We played the Putera & Tasik 9’s in that order which meant that the second 9 was rather warm! The course was in good condition but much dryer than expected; especially the greens which were hard and quite fast. Teeing off at just after 8am we made good progress and the last flight was back at 12:20pm. 8 of us then reassembled at the usual M&M place for an excellent lunch washed down with many bottles of the amber nectar, all for RM290.

The damage. Collected RM1100. G/F & Caddies RM1062. Winners Prize RM50. Lunch RM290. Lunch collection RM320. Balance in hand RM18.

The winner was Peter Barker with an excellent gross 80 (37 back 9) and 37 points.


Name
H/Cap Gross Points Result
Alan Holgate
36 130 14 9
Barry Sage
18 100 26 7
Erol Akinci
22 101 29 6
Graham Cadman
25 100 33 3
Hans Berger
22 95 35 2
Mike Smith
24 101 31 4 OCB
Peter Barker
9 80 37 1
Robert Mullis
31 107 31 5 OCB
Tony Morris
17 105 20 8

Results – Batam Away – Tering Bay – 4th November 2014

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The last day of the 3 day Batam Away was played at Tering Bay which was located very close to the Palm Springs course we played on Day 2. There were now 9 of us as Martin Walsh had left that morning to return to Singapore by ferry to catch a flight to Australia ….. noted however that he left the hotel without paying for the room and had to sheepishly call Ray Funnell from the ferry terminal to sort out this small issue!

Tering Bay Golf Club was a little jaded in comparison to Palm Springs but the course was very good with excellent and rather fast greens. We headed out at around 10:30am and the 3 flights were completed by around 3pm or so. Drinks and some snacks were enjoyed on the terrace before heading off for a seafood restaurant close-by for dinner. The restaurant was not the one as recommended by Jeff Pearce but obviously some relative or friend of the bus driver … however the food was fresh and they had cold beer so we all enjoyed a good dinner right by the sea.

Results

It was Stuart Taylor who won on this last day with an excellent personal best gross of 77 and 45 points with Bernard Romahn in second place with 40 points on count back from Andrew Robinson also on 40 points. Stuart won 2 sleeves of balls and Bernard got one sleeve of balls. Full results from Day 3 are below:

The overall winner of the 3 day Batam Away competition was Richard Moss with a total of 115 points who had led from Day 1 and with a substantial lead after 2 days it was going to be difficult to catch him. Second was Andrew Robinson with 109 points. Richard Moss was presented with an engraved winners tankard kindly donated by Glenn Wombwell. Jeff Pearce was presented with a consolation sleeve of balls for having the lowest total points for the 3 days. The final 3 day results are tabulated below :

Photos

Video

Iain Wise does an excellent impersonation of Ray Funnell teeing off on Hole No 1, Tering Bay Golf Course.