Loose Cannons Xmas Lunch – Coliseum Cafe – 12th December 2014

The annual Loose Cannons Xmas lunch was held once again at the classic venue of the Coliseum Cafe on Jalan Tuankul Abdul Rahman on Friday 12th December 2014 … probably because none else would have us!
We had 19 shows for today’s frivolity and as per standard practice we all met up in the front bar before lunch for some pre-lunch drinks. Glen unfortunately could not make it as he was up-to-his-ass in contractors at home without the supervising builder who had disappeared to Cambodia. It was nice to see that the bar and the restaurant through the back were proudly displaying some photographs from our previous escapades here last Xmas …. no doubt after today there will be a few more!
At 1pm prompt we adjourned to the back room behind a rather meagre modesty screen to shroud us from the general public …. this was to no avail as the noise we made no doubt disturbed all diners in this area. As we sat down we commenced the usual child-like displays of firing off poppers, spraying string on each other and generally making rather a lot of mess and noise.
We commenced proceedings with a toast to absent friends and raised our glasses and thoughts for the late Murray Preston and Gordon Wingate who have sadly left for higher fairways. A number of dress code violations were pointed out to some 5 members and they had to down their glass of beer or wine.
The food arrived quickly .. starting with prawn cocktails then followed by a rather tasty pumpkin soup. The wine of course was flowing freely now and we started the traditional procedure of individuals standing and reciting poetry, singing songs or telling jokes. Hans Berger was quick off the mark with his rat-at-tat song which he had already done in the bar prior to lunch.
The main course was the traditional steak pies with vegetables and salad and we also had some very nice roast chicken with gravy. Desert was ice cream and apple pie …. although Hans Berger managed to conjure up an additional chocolate cake from the kitchen somehow.
As the wine continued to flow there were many contributions to the entertainment including Irish songs from Martin Walsh and of course the classic “On Ilkley Moor” from Richard Moss. Iain Wise did another golf impression but didn’t quite match the performance he delivered in Batam. Barry Cousins read an amusing letter and his reply to HSBC regarding insurance cover and also showed the group an ancient hickory shafted golf stick to the group. Tony Morris told his usual annual joke which always goes down well and Robert Mulliss led many a rugby song with the support of the group. Mike Smith told a number of good jokes and also recited some great poems (albeit struggling occasionally to remember the lines) – well done Mike. Paul Geddes was also in good form but for some of his recitals needed a Scottish-English translator. Brian Stubbs was in good vocal form with many jokes no doubt aided by the many white wines he slammed down with Robert Mulliss.
Another excellent Xmas lunch and no doubt we will have a few on-on stories later perhaps.
Many thanks to Andrew Robinson who organised and booked the lunch.


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